Epic Observations About Indian...Epics.

Personal Photo of Artemisia Gentileschi and Pippy Longstocking, June 2016 They gon' raise a bull Shiny people in the woods Ceremony: labor of love He is king Girl marries Yama, king of the dead He says don't go south Guess what she does Her mother is suffering torment for refusing to feed a Brahman She asks Yama what can be done He says if her brother will part with some of his reward, then their mother can be freed Her brother doesn't wanna do that Yama says there's a Brahman woman suffering child birth who could They work out  deal where the woman lives instead of going straight to heaven, the girls mum goes straight to heaven, and the girl is happy next story Poor sad wife and goddess who eats elephants son with no father Cut him to pieces next story Enormous snake next story Daughter of the Destroyer is gonna mess you up Also more snakes JK he worships her now Source:  D. N. Neogi, "Sacred Tales of India." 1916

Personal photo of Pippy Longstocking, January 2017 snake boys adopt girl who feeds them girl is taken to snake boys' mom's place but messes up feeding all the other snakes girl is gracious with only half the jewels given the rest and king is tricked into adopting girl as a daughter next one the one with the girl who loves the hermit so much that its impossible for him to die next one a brahman who lives upon charity is a greedy asshole and won't share cakes with his wiffe and two daughters even though his wife is the one who made the cakes wife can't refuse her daughters and gives them cakes, father is resolved to abandon them father takes them into the woods, fakes his death while they nap, then leaves them to die tree opens up and saves them they find ladies worship and the lake dries up because they weren't sincere enough and they apologize with a ring of hay, and the god asks their wish and they wish to live happily and for their father to be ...

Turmoil He doesn't remember marrying her? The gem is found in the mouth of a fish and the police think the fish man stole it but it smells like its been in a fish She pretty and he imagines her pretty Disbelieving reunion yay happy Personal Photo, July 2016 Source:  Kalidasa. Shakuntala and Other Works

An elegant deer chase in a chariot King visits a hermitage, sees a fair maiden, watches her creepily Lots of bees, very good Clown wants to not hunt Goes to guard the hermitage instead of feed his mother when she breaks four day fast Sweet words in the trees interrupted by a mother A guest scorned, curses the marriage but after the girl's friends' kindness he says when the king sees a gem he has given her. Her friends adorn her. Personal Photo, August 2016 Source: Kalidasa. Shakuntala and Other Works

Photo: Cat by Jerry Liu One by one the seasons had gone by Oh yay more bow stuff It's a trap! Reunion with parents Princely duties Hey look the Pandavas are back The sun itself was pale Indra's back at the very end Source:  Sister Nivedita, Cradle Tales of Hinduism

Photo: Earthworm by pfly 'Put in prison, eigth child Krishna, cross river on ford following jackal, baby very heavy, give to king of cowherds Baby kills vampire nurse, baby kills other demons, knocks over two trees Young Krishna does cool shit that's still celebrated Krishna and the Alaskan Bull Worm Krishna and the snake with a million heads that poisoned a lake Peacock feather on Krishna's crown Krishna was born to put an end to worship of weather deities, and encourage worship of Narayan, so when he saw the rain sacrifice being prepared, he got angry. He suggested they worship the mountain instead, cause it's their home, and so they did. Indra gets pissed cause he wants his offering, dammit. Indra sent enough rain to kill them, but Krishna lifted up the mountain so they could use it like an umbrella, and they stayed under there for a week, until Indra tuckered himself out and began to worship Krishna, who was greater than he. Source: Sister Nivedit...

Flowers by Christina Rutz If there's an ornery horse, find one that's worse. If you open your mouth to talk about one thing gone, more things will leave. That crane again. If you fight, you get eaten. If you're different, don't talk. (Half Jackal, half lion) Just stay home. Lies will feed you. Female lions are the ones that hunt, dumbass. "Let me tell you a story about a girl who had actual standards and wouldn't just marry the first thing that proposed to her." If you stink, you won't be eaten. The Goblins again. No nose man gives flowers to honest boy. Source: W. H. D. Rouse, The Giant Crab, and Other Tales from Old India

Fairy Cat by Stu Rapely If you have enemies, crush them. Crocodile tears "Tell-tale tit" If someone steals your plough, steal their son. What the fuck does Buddha have against cats? It's that talking turtle again. Don't put monkeys in charge of a garden.  Only a great fool entrusts tasks to the foolish. If no one blesses you when you sneeze, Goblins can gobble you up. Straws will save you from Goblins. Poems are hard. Faeries will fuck you up. Source: W. H. D. Rouse, The Giant Crab, and Other Tales from Old India

Orion Playing with a Feather by Tambako the Jaguar Uttara "Of Lunar Race" Dice always ends badly for someone Went off with the Pandavas God can't decide who to favor  Abhimanyu must tell his wife goodbye, but Uttara says something bad is gonna happen, don't go Helped him dress for battle She plays with dolls and toys, so she's gotta be pretty young? Hopped up on a funeral pyre cause that's what widows do? Sati Learns about Siva Smeared his body with the ashes of the dead? Siva loves Sati very much and she's his life Siva doesn't stand when Sati's dad walks in so he's pissed He let's her go even though it's probably gonna be bad Oh no you abused my husband with your words now you have a goat head and I'll die ...like wow could you not have just left instead of dying? Siva gets pissed and destroys shit so Vishnu has to chop him up in little pieces Source:  Sunity Devee, Nine Ideal Indian Women

Maggie and Yellow Rose by Ann Savitri Visited hermitages and was well educated Soul mates love at first sight  Kind to old people  Princess can't marry exiled beggar but loves him only but doesn't want to disobey her parents bit her parents love her and don't want to force her to obey He's destined to die in a year Woman's destiny is to love? "The year may short, but the happiness will be heavenly to me, and it's memory will live forever! And, if it is written for me to become a widow, I shall be one, no matter whom I marry." They get married and she leaves the palace to help care for his blind father. Yom, Lord of Death She was granted children but she can't have kids without a husband so she got him back? Damayanti "A crumpled leaf lay in his bed of roses" Has a daughter Damayanti who even has 4 gods as her suitors Nal wins her heart with a letter in a bird's beak More blushing Oh good there are tests...

Happy tongue Tuesday from Amber! by hehaden "Is it worth all this conflict?" All people can do is fight WHY AM I BEING IGNORED I AM GREAT (Draupadi) [The day is coming. Do not fear.] No, I won't eat at your house; I'm not desperate and I don't like you. Bad omens: Cloudless blood showers, whirlwinds, earthquakes, meteors, jackals howl Sobbing on the floor of his chariot Source:   Narayan, R. K., The Mahabharata: A Shortened Modern Version of the Indian Epic.

Source "Stop, this pond is mine. Don't touch it until you answer my questions." Nobody listens. Are these the five stupidest boys alive? So many questions from Yama, God of justice Did the Pandavas disappear? They couldn't have! If you hit them with a tree, they'll know it's you. The auspicious hour for a wedding? 17 kinds of foolish men Assured them that their end was coming Source:   Narayan, R. K., The Mahabharata: A Shortened Modern Version of the Indian Epic.

Enemies by John Finn Agni took fine sons, but not the right ones (they laughed grimly) Gods support them, so ask them back Purification ceremony World ruled by demons until they fought over a girl Agni needs animal fat; forest and animals burned down; pyro given good weapon I read the signs and portents Pandava brothers loose everything gambling--even their wife The miracle of endless saris "Hey, why didn't you dense motherfuckers defend me?" Draupadi goes OFF Source:   Narayan, R. K., The Mahabharata: A Shortened Modern Version of the Indian Epic.

I'll marry you, but you must never question anything I do. Vows to be celibate, but urged to impregnate widows. "First pray to Yama, the God of Death and Ultimate Justice. He is the most judicious among the celestial beings. The son born to him will always lead our Kuru race along the right path at all times." (9) Giving back half of the kingdom because they're friends. Five godly sons versus one hundred human ones secret code SECRET TUNNEL "Remember that the jackal emerges from many outlets underground" One wife married to five brothers Why must wives always be tested? Six Cats by Robert Skorek Source:   Narayan, R. K., The Mahabharata: A Shortened Modern Version of the Indian Epic.

Cave by Sheep"R"Us Argument about Rama's motivations and doubt Sita banished while pregnant Ice castle Literally walks all over her Skeleton covered in flower vines River Sita's sons are taught to sing Rama's praises She's still not over him. Crazy. Rama finds his sons, and wants to take them back but not Sita. "If I have always been pure, may mother earth take me back into her womb because fuck you." Source: Sita Sings the Blues by Nina Paley, 2008.

woman warrior 2 by Shavawn The sun and the moon are being pulled by chariots. (I can't watch this movie full screen. It's so wobbly, it's making me nauseous.) "Don't let the door hit your ass on the way out" Sita singing. (Post-Ramayana Sita singing in a smoky old bar or something about her blue man.) Ravana wasn't all bad? According to the narrators the only bad thing Ravana did was steal Sita. "The only reason I don't destroy you with my own divine power is because Ramma has not ordered me to" Honey he's not there he can't say nothing. Something about fire Sita is happily struck by lightning (Is the static just on my computer or does everyone hear that? Because that's unbearable.) Source:   Sita Sings the Blues by Nina Paley, 2008.

Hamuman watches Sita awhile before he rescues her and sees Sita refuse Ravana. Sita's about ready to hang herself. Hamuman let's himself be captured to tell Ravana about Rama and urge him to change his ways? Hamuman sets everything but the trees that Sita sits under on fire. Vibishana betrays his brother Ravana and goes to seek Rama. They all throw crap into the sea, even the little squirrels, and the god of the sea arranged it into a bridge so they can cross to Lanka. The sleeping brother and the invisible son. Omens: his bow strings suddenly snapped, mountains shook, thunder rumbled, horses cried, elephants moved dejectedly. "Sita was overjoyed. She had been in a state of mourning all along, completely neglectful of her dress and appearance, and she immediately rose to go out and meet Rama as she was.  But Hanuman explained that it was Rama's express wish that she should dress and decorate herself before coming into his presence." (161). And she told hi...

Ravana gets to Sita by taking care of her charity. They have fairies of the woods? The younger monkey, Sugreeva, asks Rama to help him kill his brother who is unjustly murderous. Rama does, and when Vali is shot he has to be explained to why Rama wasn't unjust. "When the Rains Cease" -- "Yes, later. The rainy season is coming. At the end of it, come with an army. There will be time enough." (116) "Women can lead one to death," (115). Wow, what a crock. Manmatha, god of love. Lakshmana, upon meeting the women of Sugreeva's court, is reminded of his mothers, and nearly weeps. "I will not describe to you her waist, which is, as it should be, delicate and unseen." (126) No, nu-uh, no bueno. snmky-009.jpg by Koji Ishii Narayan, R. K., The Ramayana: A Shortened Modern Version of the Indian Epic.  (Reading Guide)

Lakshmana is ready to fight everyone on Rama's behalf, which is excellent. Everyone needs a bff like Lakshmana. But also, a key part of the dynamics of this interaction is that Rama soothes Lakshmana because he's cool with Bharatha ruling. They even consult the palace astrologer before leaving on a long journey. "And he listed a series of the blackest sins for which people were committed to hell." (62) Bharatha puts Rama's shoes on the throne and rules as regent. Ravana has ten heads? And falls in love when Soorpanaka describes Sita? Ravana's uncle Mareecha says not to go near Rama. Sita wants the pretty gold deer, and Rama agrees to get it for her without thought, when he would usually think about it. Bracken House - London by Remko van Dokkum Narayan, R. K., The Ramayana: A Shortened Modern Version of the Indian Epic.  (Reading Guide)

A full moon ritual needs to be done, but evil spirits are preventing it from being done in the sacred place. The practitioner asks for the help of the younger, not the older, which frustrates the older. It's stupid that Ahalya is turned to stone for the sins of Indra, who is covered with vaginas, then eyes. Gautama doesn't seem wise for a sage. It would interesting if Ahayla was released by Rama in the modern day, and became some sort of Black Widow fighter assassin and made Indra pay. "Rama said to Ahalya, 'May you seek and join your revered husband, and live in his service again. Let no your heart be burdened with what is past and gone.'" (22). And Ahalya laughed in his face and went off to seek her justice. Rama said her heart was purified, but it was never impure in the first place, for no man's hands had the power to sully her glory. I need a bed on a slab of moonstone. There's a lot of good stuff about auspicious stars. "I dream of com...